ARCHAEOLOGISTS DISCOVER ANCIENT FEMUR THAT COULD MAKE MOUTHWATERING BROTH
SIBERIA, RUSSIA—Hailing it as among the most intact and substantial
Paleolithic-era finds ever unearthed, a team of archaeologists from
University College Dublin announced Wednesday the discovery of an
ancient human femur that could make a rich, mouthwatering broth. “Based
on our preliminary analysis, this thighbone dates back some 65,000 years
and appears to be ideal for preparing an enticing, flavorful soup stock
that’s hearty and delicious,” said Dr. Harold Brecht, adding that after
slowly simmering the recently unearthed prehistoric bone with some sea
salt, aromatic vegetables, and a bay leaf, one would have the beginnings
of a tasty broth that was at once savory and delicate. “We’ve also
found significant evidence that strongly suggests this early femur could
be roasted for extra depth of flavor and then tossed into a crock pot
with carrots, parsnips, potatoes, and two to three pounds of beef shank
for a robust stew that would be delightful on a chilly day. Maybe with
some nice, crusty bread to dip in it, too.” Brecht added that he and his
research team would have more than enough soup base to last through the
winter provided they are able to excavate the remainder of the early
human’s skeleton.
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